You’re simply not going to find what you’re looking for online.
Every time I go online these days, three words rattle around in my head like a mantra. Often, they are directed towards myself, when I’m clicking on the fourth article about some stranger who has been cancelled for dubious reasons. But increasingly, I say them as a kind of incantation to the countless people I see online acting in a way that is clearly counter to their best interest: Just log off.
I can’t think of one online dust-up, cancellation, ruckus, brouhaha, Twitter screenshot apology, or controversial company statement—followed by another bizarre statement that clarifies the first one—that wouldn’t be…
How reducing my workweek by 20% had an expansive impact on my life
I started working four days per week by accident.
In March 2020, my then-employer was cutting back in the early days of the pandemic, and everyone in the company was asked to reduce their hours. At the time, I considered myself lucky that I was only asked to reduce one day per week’s pay, when some of my former colleagues were asked to sacrifice much more.
But now, a year on, a consider myself lucky for another reason: I’ve discovered that working four days a week instead of five is transformative. I had no idea that reducing my working week…
One hour of writing, three days a week, amounts to more than it sounds
I’ve never been much of a “ritual” person when it comes to writing. If I need to, I can write anywhere, anytime, about anything. After all, if I were too precious about the conditions around writing, I wouldn’t have made much money from doing it.
But in our new pandemic life, when in theory it should be much easier to find time to write the things that are purely creative and without obligation or deadline, I found that it was not. Sure, I could do the things that were required for my job, or for contracts and paychecks I had…
Dave Ramsey and I are ideological opposites. Listening to his show made me realize that doesn’t matter as much as I thought.
If you don’t know who Dave Ramsey is, then there’s a high likelihood that you’re probably someone like me: a liberal millennial who, under most circumstances, is not remotely interested in hearing what conservative baby boomers think about how you should live your life.
If you do know who he is, then it’s likely you are one of the millions of Americans who is in serious debt. The Ramsey Show is the third largest nationally syndicated radio show in the U.S., with 20 million combined weekly listeners. His “seven baby steps” formula and 19 national bestselling books have helped millions…
Shifting to small town after ten years of city life has felt like a second adolescence
When you live in a big city, it can be very difficult to imagine living anywhere else.
So much of your career, identity, social life, earning potential, and dreams for the future feel inextricably linked with the chaos, kismet, and opportunities of city life. But then, once every century or so, a global pandemic unfolds that challenges your career, identity, social life, and dreams in one gigantic swipe.
At least that’s what happened to me. And so, just under a year ago, I moved from a city of about 9 million to a town of about 60,000. I did this…
Stop trying to ‘empty your mind’ of thoughts. Think of barking dogs instead.
There are all kinds of reasons to meditate, but I’m going to be honest: There are probably more reasons not to do it.
It’s really hard. It’s not particularly fun. It’s not productive. It’s also just kind of boring. Every time I do it, there are usually five other things I’d rather do first.
For all of these reasons, I’m always wary of lifestyle journalism extolling meditation’s benefits as if it’s akin to jogging, or the copy of well-funded apps making meditation sound like a breezy self-help adventure. I find both unhelpful at best and off-putting at worst. The truth…
I’d be mortified if anyone read my daily tasks from the past year
A lot of people despise the tyrannical, never-ending nature of to-do lists. I am not one of them. To-do lists have always imbued a sense of order into my world. To-do lists keep track of things I can’t. In my life, to-do lists are a friend, not a foe.
About a year ago, I switched back to a paper and pen to write my daily list. Life in pandemic shutdown was simply too overwhelming and too dominated by screens to continue using my phone’s Notes app to keep track of each bizarre day. …
The power of saying ‘You don’t need to respond to this’
Earlier this year, when I had Covid, people naturally checked in on me by text during my illness and recovery.
All of the messages came from a place of caring. But they all kind of stressed me out, too.
I loved receiving and reading the support, but I felt overwhelmed by the expectation, either implicit or explicit, that I respond. How was I feeling, people wanted to know? Too overwhelmed and tired to answer any texts, was the honest answer.
This went on for weeks. It wasn’t until after I felt better that I realized how to avoid inflicting this…
Experiment with props, try new classes, and maybe even ditch your screen
Yoga is an ever-evolving, ancient practice with South Asian origins. But for many people living in the West, yoga has meant something very specific for the past several decades: thin, lithe, usually white women bending in spandex in a minimalist hardwood floor studio.
The past year has thankfully changed some of that perception.
For the first time, people who want to practice yoga have had no choice but to do so from home. Luckily, there has been no shortage of Zoom classes, YouTube videos, and fitness apps for both experienced practitioners and eager pandemic beginners. And beautifully, many people have…
Don’t think of it as a phase or a reaction to difficulty. Think of it as an act of kindness
There’s a meme that I encounter every now and then that reads: People go to therapy to deal with the people in their lives that won’t go to therapy.
It reminds me of a conversation I often have with various friends. We’ll be dissecting some relationship conflict or family crisis, and inevitably reach the same exasperated conclusion: Why doesn’t everyone just understand they should go to therapy! Life would be so much easier! And look at the evidence!
Of course, it’s true that therapy isn’t as financially accessible as it should be, and that many of the challenges we face…
Rosie Spinks
Writing about how to create a meaningful life in a chaotic world. Formerly a lifestyle and business reporter. Find me: rojospinks.com @rojospinks.
